This One Night In Kansas

It turns out that when you exit the Denver metro area, the sweet, rich weed money, that the Denver area uses to keep the roads smooth, RUNS OUT. Holy Moses!

Exactly five miles outside of Denver is when our half gallon of milk made itself into a milkshake! Dumb me made the mistake of having two large coffees, while we were packing up to head out of Central City and my bladder was about to burst. 🫣 Suddenly we were in no man’s land and once again no cell signal to distract me from my pee pee woes. Sigh! I refused to ask Ben to stop before his bladder needed relief because he drinks about a gallon of water an hour and that would be embarrassing if I had to go first. Nope. Not happening.

Ben FINALLY claimed full bladder, just as I was about to burst in his leather seats. We found a strange gas station about an hour out of Denver. It was a Yeti themed gas station out in the middle of nowhere, which was strange in itself. The good news about this stop was that everyone, including Peppy got to empty their bladders. We also put everything back in cabinets and drawers in the Airstream, because our crap had flown out of every compartment, on that bumpy stretch. Crazy, but at that moment we were trying to leave, a spontaneous cement truck parade just came out of nowhere. I have no clue what would require that many cement trucks because it apparently wasn’t road repair. We got trapped, for what seemed like HOURS, trying to leave this gas station. I’ve never seen so many cement trucks at one time! The most unexciting parade I’ve ever been forced to watch. 🥱

No matter how bad the roads were outside of Denver, a day driving through Kansas is almost worse. BORING! I thought I was tired of seeing rocks, and I’m pretty confident that I’m still sick of rocks for a while, but now I’m just as sick and tired of windmills. There are a bazillion windmills across that state and now I’m dizzy. 😩 Cows are at least kinda fun to watch. Where are all the cows???

Hours of no cell signal and reading my e-book was out of the question, unless I wanted to have a seizure on these awful roads. I already felt guilty because Ben has had to do all the driving of this monster rig, so I promised myself I wouldn’t sleep. So instead, I attempted a thumb war with Pepper and lost because she thought she was going to get one of Ben’s beef sticks for winning. She got her prize and boy is she strong when she wants food! BAD decision to lose that thumb war. Pepper got double revenge with beef stick toots. 🤢

My options for entertainment were running low and I didn’t need any more dog farts stinking up the truck with my little games. So, I just spent my time torturing Pepper. She thought I was gonna be sweet and invite her into my lap, but instead I tortured her with selfies while she made strange gurgles and whiny noises. LOL She soooo badly wanted to be up front in my lap, but I can only do so much Pepper lap time when my bladder, even though it was just emptied, is being bounced around and my bowels are still rumbling. Combine that with the HOURS in between finding civilized potties and this is what my blog looks like today…

Excuse my language but there isn’t shit in Kansas to report on. Sadly, I wish there was something, anything exciting to say because this is the birth state of our daughter. Sorry Hannah. Your birth state is BORING! But I got you a keepsake pic!

We arrived at our campground in Salina, KS and still boring! We had a mountain man with a beard down to his knees in the spot next to us. He was kinda entertaining as he shuffled around the campground, but I wasn’t sneaky enough to get a pic without a potential murder/death/kill. He looked sinister. 😳

And the only other speck of anything interesting was this beauty.

Oh and the best part of my evening was baking cookies and making Ben’s face do this because they were pumpkin spice cookies. He kinda looks like a puckery pumpkin spice by this point of the trip with that beard. LOL

Off to Fayetteville, Arkansas next! We get to see Hannah and Ty in their new house!